Friday, October 16, 2009
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Getting Better
I will now begin regretting what I said about Photoshop. I am so terribly sorry, Mr. Photoshop. I mean, I still want the entire design team sent to a forced labor camp and mmade to work long hours, but hey, I did do something...totally worthless...with Photoshop.
Check out this poor girl. I made her lips blue and her eyes a really creepy color! I named her "Slaneeshaston." Oh, and, by the way, if you stumble across this, girl-who-I-Photoshopped-mercilessly-and-is-the-one-pictured-above, I'm sorry, but Chuck Norris told me to do it! And if I refused, I would be obliterated!
This gopher needs to see his real estate agent and get a better home. No gopher deserves to live in a cup! Wait, he's a gopher person. Gophers don't have real estate agents! I shall help him!
There! Now, he is homeless. Stupid gopher, cups are for people! So, in conclusion, I apologize to Photoshop for all the honest, cruel, harsh meaniness I heaped upon you. Now, Chuck Norris will not erase you from existence, but instead, just give you are wedgie that will tear off everything below your waist. Meanwhile, I shall laugh.
Check out this poor girl. I made her lips blue and her eyes a really creepy color! I named her "Slaneeshaston." Oh, and, by the way, if you stumble across this, girl-who-I-Photoshopped-mercilessly-and-is-the-one-pictured-above, I'm sorry, but Chuck Norris told me to do it! And if I refused, I would be obliterated!This gopher needs to see his real estate agent and get a better home. No gopher deserves to live in a cup! Wait, he's a gopher person. Gophers don't have real estate agents! I shall help him!There! Now, he is homeless. Stupid gopher, cups are for people! So, in conclusion, I apologize to Photoshop for all the honest, cruel, harsh meaniness I heaped upon you. Now, Chuck Norris will not erase you from existence, but instead, just give you are wedgie that will tear off everything below your waist. Meanwhile, I shall laugh.Monday, October 12, 2009
Eat Cheez-Its Until You Explode into a Ball of Pure Fire, Photoshop!
PHOTOSHOP SHALL END...FOREVER...
Thursday, October 1, 2009
DEATH TO PHOTOSHOP!
I tried to use photoshop today. And now, I want to destroy every last person involved in the creation of this EVIL software! Photoshop is a terrible calamity. It's worse than 9/11, Pearl Harbor, the Hindenburg disaster, and Rosie O'Donnell combined! I wanted to put Tina Fey's beautiful face... 
...onto the HEV suit of theoretical physicist and savior of the human race Gordon Freeman...
...but NOOO, I can't. Why not? YOU DON'T WANT TO COOPERATE WITH ME! Photoshop's design team will soon encounter Chuck Norris, and he won't be giving them autographs! Yay!
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